Every year, piracy costs the film industry over $12 billion. The Emoji Movie is the counter-argument to those who criticise the usually selfish crime; to pay for a film so cynically and carelessly made would be the first step towards getting yourself sectioned. TJ Miller for some reason plays Gene, a Meh emoji who doesn't conform to the phone society's rules in a 'be yourself because it's okay to be different' narrative emulating the competently done The Lego Movie. Ctrl+C and Ctrl+V that plot - right down to its spiky, dyed-hair female support/love interest - and replace Lego with emojis and you have this Sony cash grab. Just remove spirited vocal performances with apathy, character-based humour with shit-based puns and add in a dash of disappointed in Sir Patrick Stewart. For James Corden though, this is a pretty lateral move.
In Sony's mind, all millennials seem to despise using prose which isn't a cartoon face (an unnecessary and insulting conceit), so emojis take their work very seriously. But how does their society work? They seem to eat, sleep and live their own vague lives with this solitary purpose. Why do the emojis only have to have one emotion when so many express several per scene that aren't Gene? How come only some have clothes? Is Gene therefore a naturist? It's almost as if there's no consistency whatsoever. Nothing is explored properly. Everything raises questions. If you were to ever doubt Sony's intent to take a simplistic and derivative idea and invest a (comparatively) measly $50 million to make an aesthetically uninspired animated film purely for cash reasons, then affirm your suspicions with the shameless advertisement for Just Dance, Dropbox and a plethora of other apps. Sickeningly, even when a distressed Gene is trapped in Candy Crush and, he sings the praises of the game.
It's not that this premise couldn't have had something original or interesting going for it, or at least humour. You pray for a joke, although ultimately it falls somewhere between Meet the Spartans and Sophie's Choice on the sliding scale of comedy. Only the line "Argh! Quiet ye sassy gypsy!" is worth a smile, but probably just as a new favourite insult.
Shamelessly 'trendy'. Forced and obvious love subplot. A contemptible take on feminism that makes you aloof and unpleasant. There isn't feeling left to type more of the criticisms. I am numb.
Well if they're not going to at least try to make something watchable, we're not going to bother with a rating. Damn sassy gypsies.
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