Many people doubted the cockney as a choice to direct a take on Arthurian legends (or Aladdin for that matter), and it seems that the man once celebrated for stylish crime capers has proven the following: he's lost any sort of touch he had. His notable cross-cutting technique is about as welcome in this medieval setting as a cup of piss to the face. The famous Arthur Pendragon (a game Charlie Hunnam) is a cheeky wheeler-deeler more akin to Del Boy than a noble leader. Giant elephants roam the landscape in an ugly CGI nightmare of an opening sequence. Kung Fu is present. Nothing is as it should be, and none of these additions work, especially when he tries to have it both ways with Tolkein-ish folk music alongside the more boisterous elements.
The fantastical elements feel like derivative attempts at Peter Jackson, while the presence of two Game of Thrones alumni in supporting roles almost confirm the (personal) belief that Warner Bros. are trying to cash in on the TV show's supreme success. Ritchie himself has gradually lost the identity that made his name with his Hollywood works, producing functional and enjoyable works that don't break the mould. Here we find him at his lowest point in years, attempting to inject a dull film with energy through his editing techniques, but ending up wearing us out before Arthur has even accepted his identity as the true King, let alone before he has to face up against his villainous uncle (Jude Law). Should we care for someone raised in a brothel - who had to toughen up to survive - when his upbringing is lazily shown through a truncated montage? Arguably not; if it mattered, why do so in such a brief manner?
Furthermore, the heads of a bland supporting cast see a flat quasi-love interest in Àstrid Bergès-Frisbey, an underdeveloped villain simply intoxicated by power and clumsily shown to be evil through cliched Nazi imagery and a criminally underused Djimon Hounsou. Yet again, Hounsou has a role in a major blockbuster and given bugger all to do after Furious 7 Legend of Tarzan and even in the otherwise brilliant Guardians of the Galaxy.
Finally, let's mention the special effects eagle that comes to the rescue in true Lord of the Rings fashion and its godawful texture. It epistemic the overly rendered visuals and the way everything looks like a video game. The action sequences are also as fun and tension-less as a quick-time event in a game; you have no power over what happens and get no gratification.
TWO STARS. Remember BBC's Merlin? Go watch that instead. Kate McGrath actually has a cameo in this film, reminding me how I'd rather just watch two episodes of that instead.
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